Standup
by crumpdumps
Summary: Lup and Barry go out and try to have a nice night.


Lup let her curls flow over her shoulders before twirling around to face Barry. "Do I look okay?" She raised an eyebrow and spread her arms.

Barry paused buttoning his flannel sleeves to look at his wife. She was in a simple outfit, just a pair of shorts and a red baseball tee, but she looked stunning. "You look amazing, babe." He walked to her and pressed a quick kiss on her lips.

She smiled and picked up her perfume. "For the record, you look particularly handsome today." She sprayed her torso and wrists before putting on her shoes.

"And I don't look handsome on other days? Barry replied as he tried to tame his hair, looking to her with a cocked eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes. "Of course you do. But today, you just look amazing." She smiled over at him and leaned on the wall.

Barry smiled back and joined her near the door. "Thanks hun." He took her hand and led her out the door.

The bar wasn't the… biggest, but it was a quaint little place with a thatched roof and a sign on the door that said "Welcome All! Please Wipe Your Muddy Shoes Before Entering!". Lup and Barry made sure to follow the signs direction before opening the door and walking in.

It looked like any regular old bar. There were various tables scattered around, a couple pool tables, a jukebox, and the same bar stools that seemed to be everywhere. Lup took Barry's hand and led him to the bar, sitting near the edge close to the bathroom.

"What'll it be?" A gravely but warm voice asked from behind the bar. A man with a scraggly beard and a bald head asked.

Lup raised her eyebrows and looked at Barry. "Hi, can I have some… vodka shots?"

The man put the glass he was cleaning down and gathered up his shotglasses and the vodka. He poured her three before looking at Barry. "And you?"

He tugged at his shirt collar before saying, "Just a beer, please."

The man grunted and reached under the bar, pulling a bottle out by its neck and placing it on the bar in front of Barry. "You two have a nice night." He opened Barry's bottle before picking up his glass and tending to the next pair of customers.

Lup downed one of her shots before smiling at Barry. "He seemed nice."

"For sure." He took a drink before grimacing. "This beer is really strong." He smacked his lips softly and put it down.

Lup took a swig and shrugged. "It's not bad. Wanna trade?" She gestured down to her shots.

"Sounds like a plan." He took one of the glasses and downed a shot. Way better than the bug spray beer.

After another shot and a halfway empty bottle, Lup spoke up. "This is nice. We don't get out a lot."

Barry looked at her with soft eyes. "Yeah, it's really nice. I love spending time with you."

Lup slipped her hand into his, letting the chatter of the bar be the only nose for a bit. Soon, she said, "So, anything in particular you want to talk about?"

Barry thought for a moment and shrugged. "I don't know. I just wanted to spend some time with you. It's been pretty hectic with all of our plans with everyone."

Lups eyes widened slightly. "You really think so?"

"Kind of. I guess because I'm not as outgoing as you, and I'm not as good at social interaction, I just get burned out really quickly and need a break from everything, you know?" At this point he was ranting, but the vodka had loosened his tongue, so he didn't see an end.

She moved as close as she could to him. "Barry, you don't have to justify yourself. You think what you think, and it's completely fine. It's what makes us individuals. I would say human, but," she gestured at her ears, "I'm not that."

He snickered and leaned on her shoulder. "I love you."

"Love you too, babe." She picked up one of the shot glasses and downed another shot. "Are you going to drink the rest?"

Barry sat up and shook his head as he adjusted his glasses. "No, my head's already foggy, and we have to walk home." He pushed the last shot towards her and slid off his chair. "I've gotta go to the bathroom, be right back." He smiled and made his way into the bathroom.

Lup watched him disappear behind the door before grabbing the beer and turning in her chair to face the room. From what she could see, this town was fairly diverse. There were elves, halflings, dwarves, and even orcs scattered around. Each group was unique, too. At one table, there was an orcish bard, strumming calmly on their guitar. She smiled and took another drink, happy she had the opportunity to be in a town such as this.

Soon, she realized that her beer was gone. She turned back to the bar only to be met by an elven man sitting in Barry's seat. She jumped slightly at his sudden appearance. "Hello?" She said as she put her empty bottle on the bar.

"Heya sweet thing. Need another one?" He gestured down at the bottle, his thin smile and crooked nose slightly alarming. Judging by his tone, he was had been for some poor girl to harass, and Lup happened to be there.

Before she could answer, he called to the bartender and paid for another beer for the "lovely lady". Lup wouldn't turn down the free beer, but she didn't want to deal with this guy flirting with her when she had come in with her husband not even ten minutes ago.

The bartender opened the bottle for her and gave the guy a wary look before helping other customers. "So what brings such a pretty girl like you to a sleezy place like this?" The elf braced his chin on his hand.

Lup eyed the vodka shot, wondering if he had slipped anything in it or enchanted it somehow. "Just in town." As discretely as she could, she cast a small detect magic spell to see that he had, in fact, enchanted her drink.

"Well, I don't think you'd wanna come back to my place and-"

"What are you doing with my wife?" Barry suddenly appeared, his arms crossed and his usually soft expression hard and glaring.

The man laughed softly. "This chick's your wife? Yeah, you two are married and I just won the lottery!" His laugh grew as picked up the shotglass. "Here, pal, take this and run along." He waved him away.

Lup took the shot from Barry and held it out to the elf. "Why don't you drink it? If you drink it, I might consider taking your number." She batted her hair behind her shoulder and leaned on the counter, curving her back.

He looked slightly taken aback. "I can't, miss, I can't handle my li-"

"Oh, and now you call me miss? Get out of here before me and my husband team up and kick your ass to next week." She stood up and grabbed Barry's hand.

The elf rolled his eyes. "Fine. At least I tried." He shrugged and slid off the seat.

"Yeah, tried to roofie me. Thanks for the enchanted drink." She picked up the vodka and splashed it in his face. There was only a shots worth of vodka in it, but it looked like he was drenched.

Now, the entire bar was looking at them. Even the soft music had quietened.

The vodka covered elf slowly wiped his face with a hand. "You're lucky you're not here alone." He turned and stalked off and out of the bar.

Lup looked to Barry wide eyes. Barry pursed his lips and squeezed her hand reassuringly. "Alright, everyone, nothing to see here. Go on about your business." He pulled some money out of his wallet and put it on the bar.

"What? No way! Take that back, sir." The bartender shook his head and pushed his money towards him.

Barry furrowed his brows in confusion. "What?"

"You two just stood up to the worst person that's ever set foot in this bar. He's tried to drug just about every girl that comes in here." The bartender said, a smile on his face.

Lup turned and looked around the bar again. She hadn't noticed it before, but there weren't any other females in the bar with them. "Good to know. We'll still be on our way." She smiled at the bartender before leaving with Barry.

They walked in silence for a while before Barry sighed and said, "I'm so sorry I wasn't there."

Lup shook her head. "You were in the bathroom, it's okay. Also, I've dealt with this before."

"Seriously?" He shook his head with a somber expression. "This world sucks."

"Yeah. It's alright, though, I've gotten quite a few free drinks from it. I can't argue with something like that." She smiled at him, trying to lighten to situation.

Barry leaned into her and pressed a kiss on her cheek. "That's honorable. But, let's agree not to go to anymore bars in the future."

"Agreed."


End file.
